I don't have a television, so I'm always thrilled at the bar when I get a chance to see what the rest of the world is up to. Consider, for instance, that CBS is about to launch a primetime series about a vampire who is a private investigator, or, as we're supposed to say about them these days, a private investigator who happens to be a vampire. Read the promo copy and weep:
Mick St. John is a private investigator who has truly seen it all after being bitten by his vampire bride on their wedding night 60 years ago. He now lives between two realities, fighting his adversaries among the undead while being in love with a mortal woman. St. John must cautiously balance these two lives before they clash, proving that life's gravest dangers are found in the moonlight.Imagine the pitch. It'll be like CSI. But with a private investigator. Like Chinatown. But without Faye Dunaway. With some other chick who looks less like a space alien. And here's the hook. The guy's a vampire. Not like Tom Cruise was, nothing faggy like that. Like Buffy, or that Angel Spinoff. But with more Blade to it.
Hey, it beats politics.