O'Reilly evidently shoved some dude who works for Obama and threatened to take him outside and finish the job, or whatever. God, I love this dude. He is like a gargantuan mutant version of the Pittsburgh-classic, Irish-whiskey drunk: vulgarly avuncular and somehow always getting closer to your face as his breath and speech decline in quality. They ought to get rid of the current set for his show and give him a U-shape bar with a buzzing Smoke-O-Lator overhead, a natty jackalope, and three thin domestic beers on tap. He would have only one television monitor, which would be something circa 1979, ceiling-mounted behind him and playing ESPN with a lot of red bleed. Some asshole keeps playing "Jolene" on the jukebox. The pretzels are stale. The bartender is in the bathroom doing over-cut blow off the tank of the toilet, which he wiped off with his sleeve. The only other guy in the bar is an elderly black man named Hollis who's been asleep for three hours in front of his sweating Jack and Coke, but Bill eyes him warily anyway. Could be dangerous.
5 comments:
I'd watch!
You forgot the wannabe biker in the corner and the NORAID collection can. Still, it does bring back memories. As Phil Hartman said so well on News Radio, "good times, good times."
Ah, if only you had come of age in the 50's-60's.
That read like the stage directions for a Tad Mosel one-acter ...
I think we should give Drinking Liberally ten dollars to go over there and Crash the Gates[tm] at O'Reilly's place.
Shouldn't there be a framed 29 point cribbage hand and a picture of the time Estes Kefauver came in to the bar? And what about Captain Bob's steering wheel?
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