Performance-Enchancing Drugs

I wonder what they serve the Waxman Committee for lunch, but I bet that whatever it is has got Bovine Growth Hormone in it. Frankly a stellar career in sports seems to me more of a public good than early-onset puberty, but that's just me. If you're going to ban HGH from sports, you should also ban arthroscopic surgery--it unnaturally speeds recovery times and diminishes the effects of injury! The piety of these congresscritters is really astonishing. Think of the children! Soon they too will increase their muscle mass and cardiopulmonary efficiency with none of the negative side effects of traditional steroidals. Better! Faster! Safer! Healthier! BANNED!