Friday, March 07, 2008

Anals of Our Discourses

Walking toward the office today, I passed two fellows of the Homo meatheadicus variety. Their 30%-off no-wrinkle poplin-cotton pocketless point-collared Banana Republic Oxfords stretched tight across the feminine curvature of their overworked pectorals, and the roundness of their faces belied the well-into-their-thirties that their poorly-concealed spare tires gave away. The one dude said to the other dude, "Yeah, I'd be jacked off too." He meant it, clearly, as an indicator of anger, but really, does that work? I don't know about you, but I feel the expression should be used exactly oppositely from that. "I just landed a big raise! I'm totally jacked off!"

Posted by IOZ at 12:02 PM | email »
Labels:

12 comments:

puppylander said...

if i may postulate on etymology,

hijack >>> carjack >>> carjacked >>> jacked >>> jacked + ripped off >>> jacked off

it an, um, homo-nym.

1:24 PM
Anonymous said...

What about an even more basic example? "My girlfriend totally sucks hard" -- indictment or encomium?

2:13 PM
Anonymous said...

Yeah, shouldn't "Fuck you!" be a form of well-wishing? "Hey, man, fuck you!" "Thanks, dude, go get fucked yourself!"

And I've never understood the use of "cocksucker" as an insult (unless it's understood to be grounded in misogyny/homophobia, of course) - why denigrate cocksuckers? Who would ever object to having their cock sucked? There should be a Cocksucker's Day section in Hallmark to express our gratitude, for chrissakes.

2:41 PM
Anonymous said...

a lot of real sex, and maybe even more fantasy sex, takes place in contexts of domination, not mutual consent - so "cocksucker" is an insult not because receiving oral sex is unpleasant, but because providing oral sex is perceived as evidence of the degradation of the person performing it

2:55 PM
Keifus said...

Well there's "jacked up" too, no doubt familiar to the bench-pressing bozeaux. Combine that with a sense of second-choice gratification, and I think their euphemism works.

And here I thought oxfords were shoes.

3:09 PM
The Promiscuous Reader said...

"jacked off" in this context probably relates to "pissed off" and "honked off", but it is also relevant, as others have pointed out, that heterosexual males (and gay men who wanna be them) see sexual pleasure and the giving as sexual pleasure as weakening and degrading.

3:12 PM
John B. said...

"There should be a Cocksucker's Day section in Hallmark to express our gratitude, for chrissakes."

That's wonderful. Made my friday day. Couldn't agree more...

3:16 PM
Anonymous said...

Everyone knows there are no gay people in Pittsburgh. Or, indeed, anywhere outside of the Castro or the Village.

ARE. WE. CLEAR.?!?

3:31 PM
Anonymous said...

so "cocksucker" is an insult not because receiving oral sex is unpleasant, but because providing oral sex is perceived as evidence of the degradation of the person performing it

Well, yeah; I just meant that I don't understand why people who don't think of it that way use it as an insult without stopping to consider just what it is they're implying.

8:18 AM
The Promiscuous Reader said...

Part of it's just the way language works, you know. When we're learning to talk, we don't investigate the history of every word we use -- we use the words we hear other people using. Then, maybe 20 years later, we notice, or someone points out what lies beneath the surface of this or that word. By then the word is pretty well engraved into our brain paths, and though we can change it if we really want to, it still keeps its original charge.

11:01 AM
Mr.Fundamental said...

I once approached a young woman in my youth who was getting out of her car, and who had the words "You Suck" slathered across her bumper in sticker form. I informed her that, yes indeed I do suck, but even so, I suck in all the right places.

she did wind up having a drink with me.

11:25 AM
The Promiscuous Reader said...

Then there were the "Mean People Suck" bumper stickers, countered by "Nice People Swallow" stickers -- does that mean I'd have to have a nice person present whenever I suck, to finish the job for me?

2:25 PM

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)