BAGHDAD — American military forces for the first time conducted air strikes on targets in Basra late Thursday, joining Iraqi security forces in trying to oust Shiite militias in the southern port city.After five years of this bullshit, it's really remarkable that an artfag living in the slow-flowing provinces of Western PA should be called upon to elucidate martial terminology to people who supposedly dedicate their lives to fighting and reporting on wars, but mine is the land of the Whiskey Rebellion, so, heavy alas though the burden may be, I'll bear it in the spirit of our lost distilleries.
-The Times
How the hell do you "oust Shiite militias"? They're militias. Citizens. Not. A. Regular. Army. The motherfuckers live there. They're not visiting from Shiitopia, dropping in for some combat before heading home for dinner. They're not bivouacing. The motherfuckers motherfucking live there. I mean, how do you "oust" them unless you kill all the men in . . . oooohhhhhhhhhhhhh.
15 comments:
LOL!!
just the men? ioz, you conclusion is simply not serious.
the news can't seem to get enough of telling which suicide bombers are female. it seems like a pretty serious problem, so a well laid plan, taking this into consideration would surely oust the women, too.
then the shrill complainers on the radical left are always on about how all these kids whose parents get blowed up will grow up to be terrorists and hate our freedoms, so we should probably oust the young ones as well.
the time for half-measures is over.
oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh....Yeah, was waiting for you to bring on the punchline.
Big test for the new and improved Iraqi army. Nice to have some of that air support on your side. Just ask Hamas!
Land of the Whiskey Rebellion...that's good stuff!
Mike
Didn't the Whiskey Rebels get ousted in some sense? It was an unfortunate occurrence, but it still happened.
Please accept our apologies, this was just a minor slip-up in the normally invisible and insidious web of propaganda that we are weaving.
You see, it is all part of the meme that terrorists have no rights: by definition, terrorists can have no homes. They have no legitimate goals. They have no emotions or feelings. They have no legal status. They have no families. Terrorists have no territory, State, religion, nor goals, besides random destruction of nice people. Terrorists are not actually living creatures, they are a species of the Undead, and therefore by definition terrorists cannot be defending their so-called "homes".
Also, even if the terrorists in some vague theoretical sense actually "live" in Basra, please be sure to remember that, after we "oust" them -- Iraq does NOT have a refugee problem. Only nice, peace-loving Iraqi people, returning to their homes. NO REFUGEE PROBLEM. NONE, do you hear me!!
Thank you for your attention in this matter. The personnel responsible for this slip-up have been sacked.
In the phrase "Shiite militias" "militias" used to distinguish them from Shiite "police" and Shiite "army people." The grammar is that Shiite is the noun and militia, police and army people are modifiers. Clear? They are all Iranians anyway.
drip
This tactic is more permanent than vote caging every election.
You're strong this week. Pain is a spice a spice too.
Don't forget, making refugees of an entire people is not an unheard of tactic and could theoretically be called "ousting." Displacement of aboriginals where "aboriginal" has come to mean those without night scopes and air support is the new black. And genocide by burning down your home and starving you across a border is much harder to remember. After all, we can't seem to stop talking about the 6-ish million Jews but who gives a fuck about the 60-ish million extra-Soviets and the 75-ish million various flavors of Chinese? [citation provided, honkey; oh, no! Not you, the other honkey.] Am I right? Can I get a hallelujah?
Myself: It's all in the recipe, man. Salt-cured versus Dutch oven.
Me: Holy fuck, what is wrong with you?
Myself: Oh, go ibid yourself and the horse you preach out on.
Sez you. I have it on good authority that inside of EVERY ONE of those Shia is an American yearning to break out.
Incidentally, it's not just them. Every wog is an American, deep down. And nothing brings out their Yankee Doodle essence better than a JDAM, "perfect for the urban warfare that's taking place now in Iraq".
-- sglover
You totally misunderstood. "Oust Shiite militias" is army slang for 'take a really big crap.' The sewers aren't working too well out there these days, so they all had to do it in the same latrine.
Alright, if we have to be an empire and we insist on going around saying "ousting the wogs" and such, then I demand the right to grow mutton chop sideburns and wear a monocle. Eh wot? Jolly good, old bean!
This is, of course, elementary and was and wlll always be.
Smokin'!
drip's use of "Shiite" makes that word look like "Sheet" after a while.
ashley: I'll give you your "Hallelujah" - and anything else your heart desires.
Good to have the big fella back, swinging for the fences again.
Uncle Buck
Cute comments serve no purpose. The man is making a point on an issue that should be of catastrophic interest,in urgency, to all of us.
Book 'em, Dano. But seriously, no. To refuse to laugh in the face of tragedy is to refuse to be human.
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