This reminds me of one of my favorite jokes which is best told in a heavy Pittsburgh accent:
So I'm fuckin' this dude in the ass, right, and he says to me, he says, Hey buddy, can I get a little reach around? And I'm like, whaddareyou? Some kind of faggot?More pertinently, perhaps, I will suggest to Professor Delong that while the story makes Douthat an asshole, it doesn't make him quite such an asshole as if it had, in fact, occurred. I will suggest that the girl's identity is safe insofar as she isn't real.
Being a Homosexual™, this is rule number one for discerning The Truth in Your Friends' Accounts of Their Previous Night's Sexual Activities. Allow me to demonstrate:
Oh my god, last night I got fucked by this guy who no joke looked like a thinner Zach Quinto.False! As opposed to:
Oh my god, last night I was so drunk and I invited over some dude from Manhunt who turned out to be Steve from marketing! You know, the one with that voice.Believable!