Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Patio Furniture


Pittsburgh is about to ban "all furniture that's plush, upholstered or foam-filled" from porches. At $200-500 in fines for violation, the Mayor estimates that the city will make up the overruns in the North Shore Connector project by the time it opens in 2117. City Council member Tonya Payne has additionally proposed the banning of students from Oakland and automobiles from the Parkway East.

Posted by IOZ at 12:48 PM | email »
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9 comments:

lucid said...

And the logic being? Is there any logic left?

2:36 PM
IOZ said...

No. Everyman for hisself. Reincarnate the dead on Jupiter!

2:55 PM
Anonymous said...

French fries I tell you! The left conspiracy against couch potatoes!

6:23 PM
george said...

Use of inflatable Sponge Bob, snow-globe, and all other forms of front-yard Christmas displays will not - I repeat - WILL NOT - be impacted by the proposed law.

Your leader,

Luke

ps inflatable furniture, eg http://www.passion-fish.com/cache/sponge-bob-inflatable-chair-5246-0.jpg will also, obviously, be tolerated.

6:29 PM
sahibulqahwa said...

Isn't it also to discourage Puerto Ricans and their swarthy brethren from creating awful, tacky barrios in Picksburgh, with furniture and car parts strewn across porches and lawns? I'm sure this is a big part of it, and the revenue's just a nice aside.

They tried this in Allentown, and it was decried as "racist."

10:47 PM
Dunc said...

I particularly like this:

"Council members said they doubted building inspectors would be scouring the city for porch couches, but thought enforcement would be driven by neighbors' complaints."

In other words, "we have no intention of enforcing this properly, it's just a means for people to harass their neighbours for their poor taste in porch furniture."

7:54 AM
Anonymous said...

They should, however, ban bicyclists.
They present too great a danger to motorists when they share our roadways.

Mike

8:24 AM
Brian said...

Mike: And pedestrians, too. That would create more room for traffic lanes. We need to remove all obstacles to our SUV cruisin'

12:05 PM
Brian said...

Mike: And pedestrians, too. That would create more room for traffic lanes. We need to remove all obstacles to our SUV cruisin'

12:05 PM

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