Thursday, August 26, 2010

It's gettin' so a businessman can't expect no return from a fixed fight. Now, if you can't trust a fix, what can you trust?

Mr. Salehi’s relationship with the C.I.A. underscores deep contradictions at the heart of the Obama administration’s policy in Afghanistan, with American officials simultaneously demanding that Mr. Karzai root out the corruption that pervades his government while sometimes subsidizing the very people suspected of perpetrating it.

-The Times
So, lemme get this, you'll pardon the expression, straight. Being on the official payroll of an agency of a foreign government doesn't count as corruption? I mean, we deported that sexy Russian chick for being in the employ of the FSB, and her job as a Russian spy apparently consisted of what your jobs and my job as American citizens consist of: updating our Facebook status and reading blogs, occasionally ALT+TABbing back to Outlook when the boss walks by. I mean, Mohammed Zia Salehi is bought by the CIA, and the Times writes a story speculating that he might be corrupt. How do you say oy in Pashtun?

I do enjoy that reporters Filkins and Mazzetti accept and amplify the idea that we are subsidizing people who may be corrupt. Because it could certainly never be the case that the US might be corrupting people via subsidy. And isn't subsidy just the most hilarious word in this context. Homework assignment: go back through the last two years of the Times and replace every description of the the Pakistani ISI "backing" or "supporting" or "funding" the Taliban/Afghan insurgency/al Qaeda with "subsidizing." Oh, LuLz, look, they are just like the USDA. OF TERROR!

Meanwhile, there's this:
“If we decide as a country that we’ll never deal with anyone in Afghanistan who might down the road — and certainly not at our behest — put his hand in the till, we can all come home right now,” the American official said.
Sounds like a plan to me.

26 comments:

Mr.Fundamental said...

I fucking hate it when I'm not paying attention and I ALT-TAB to the Master Volume window. . .doesn't hide shit.

Professor Coldheart said...

"Karzai, you're exactly as big as I let you be and no bigger, and don't forget it, ever."

"That's right, Petraeus. You're the big shot around here, and I'm just some schnook likes to get slapped around."

Montag said...

depending on my mood, i think the Afghan corruption "controversy" is either a deliberate distraction or the inevitable effect of the war.

IOZ said...

You think that I'm some Pashtun, fresh off the poppy farm, and you can kick me! But I'm too big for that now. I'm sick ah takin the scrap from you, Kerry. I'm sick ah marching into this goddamn office to kiss your Irish ass. And I'M SICK A' THE HIGH HAT!

Mr.Fundamental said...

Youse fancy pants, all a youse.

Ethan said...

Facebook and blogs are blocked at my job, and they periodically record what's on your monitor.

Mr.Fundamental said...

that sucks!

Mr.Fundamental said...

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shit,
And you bought one.

Leonard said...

Mohammed Zia Salehi is bought by the CIA, and the Times writes a story speculating that he might be corrupt.

It may be helpful in this connection if you see the identical form between subsidizing and paying tribute to. How might we distinguish them?

LP Steve said...

My favorite quote:

“Corruption matters to us,” a senior Obama administration official said. “The fact that Salehi may have been on our payroll does not necessarily change any of the basic issues here.”

On the nose!

thoreau said...

It's so cute when the John learns that the whore has other clients.

Roxanne, you don't have to put out the red light....

Charles F. Oxtrot said...

fookin eh, IOZ. Jon Polito!

BDR said...

GAH! Not merely an allusion to Gordon Fucking Sumner, an allusion to Gordon Fucking Sumner's lamest fucking song! FAIL!

mds said...

Speak for yourself, Monsieur. I don't use Facebook, and my e-mail application is Thunderbird. So there!

The Mathmos said...

Seeing as, if I recall correctly, a few studies have stated that overall "productivity" has taken a measured dive since the introduction of ubiquitous Web access (ie. "ALT+TABbing") in the workplace, that Russian spy has been mixed up rather heavily in the ongoing Downfall of America's vaunted Protestant work ethics.

Wired magazine : "Online dilly-dallying as Sabotage 2.0?"

Salehi said...

So if you could just write me my check for ten percent of a half a million... five grand... I'll go out and mingle.

IOZ said...

No funny stuff, Jackie . . . the kid's got it.

Gene Callahan said...

BDR: Mindlessly parroting the latest popular word fad on the Internet: FAIL!

Enron said...

The Emperor whining about corruption...talk about irony.

stephanie g said...

I don't know if this will be a faux pas or OK because it's SWPL, but the Onion made a pretty lulzy video dig at the Times recently.

Soj said...

Wait, I thought the point of this message was WE CAN ALL COME HOME NOW.

TGGP said...

I suppose if an official took bribe money but then (a la Clay "Rainmaker" Davis) didn't actually quid any pro quo, that would technically make then not corrupt.

goldhorder said...

Our ME policy since 1970 is about bribes and bombs. You can take our money and at least pretend to toe the line...or you can take our bombs. Its either one or the other.

J said...

I am misguided in hoping for an epic flowchart to appear sometime this afternoon?

Peter Ward said...

Alt-Tab! Somebody isn't using a Mac.

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