Bondi said she wanted to get the stuff off the shelves before spring break in case users high on it think they can fly.There are a lot of balconies out there! WHO WILL THINK OF THE CHILDREN?
"There are a lot of balconies out there," she said.
-Palm Beach Post
Interesting note. I have had a number of psychadelic experiences that involved the vague sensation that I might be able to fly, and yet in each and every case, this sensation was accompanied by a commensurate conviction that in order to do so, I would require a long runway. Yes, mind-altering chemicals can transport you to the far Mayan reaches of the multiverse, but at the same time, the most cosmic experiences very often comingle with an hilariously intense mundanity, an obsessive conviction that in order to achieve lift-off, you must run a full mile--duh; it's only logical, man. After riding shai-hulud all night long, sometimes you just want a Denny's Grand Slam, you know what I'm saying?
Anyway, a million gay years ago, when I was a kid, I remember that flight and superhuman strength were the invariable accomplices of PCP. Oy, these kids today. Get off my lawn.
26 comments:
WHERE'S BUCKY? AND WHAT HAS HE HAAAAADDDD?
That is what leadership is all about, yo. Go ask Alia Atreides.
Yar. Graveyard for the strong shit that might never let you down. Mescalin for the boundary erasing nowhere land.
And acid, for when you want to know you're tripping, and when it will stop.
I love this statement:
Unlike real bath salts, sold as a means to relax and unwind, this product "makes you think you are seeing monsters and makes you think you can fly," Bondi told reporters.
So unlike bath salts, which are "sold as a means to relax and unwind," these bath salts are "drugs," which are sold as... a means to relax and unwind. BUT IN A BAD WAY!
Also, I like the idea that our drug warriors will inevitably outlaw conventional bath salts, decongestants, oxygen, helium, and holding your breath until you pass out.
Also, Dude, "an hilariously" is not the preferred nomenclature. "A hilariously," please.
Unless you're British or for some other reason you like you drop initial h's.
I swear to Pete, if I hear one more American say "an historic" (with plenty of hiss in that "historic"), I will fume in impotent rage.
"I oriented the mounted spotlight on the side of my patrol car toward the grassy area of the said city park, illuminating the said suspect, at which time I determined that the said suspect was aggressively spinning his body in a circular motion. Upon his completion of the said act of spinning, said suspect loudly and spontaneously stated, 'Dude, I'm so fucking dizzy right now.' At that time, I dismounted my patrol vehicle and placed the said suspect under arrest, first transporting the said suspect to the county medical center to obtain medical clearance prior to booking."
gawd help us all if they find out what happens when you ingest copious amounts of nutmeg, or smoke banana peels. Foodie Friday will never be the same again!
When I hear "an historic" whatever, I must ask "Have you read an history book recently? On an horse? With an hippy? With an hangover?
Having said that, "an hilarious" anything is correct.
Many thanks to James Wolcott for turning me on to Who is IOZ?...a sane,funny,provocative column...
"makes you think you are seeing monsters and makes you think you can fly,"
What, like Newark Liberty International?
Super human strength, huh? Maybe this is what McGwire was on when he hit 70. I remember that one time he was crying in the on deck circle and La Russa had to console him. But when he swung that bat, good lord did it make the ball go really far.
"McKeithen said 11 law enforcement officials were unable to control a man high on the drug who 'tore the radar unit out of the vehicle with his teeth.'"
HAHAHAHAHA What?!
That is amazing.
I guess I shouldn't be surprised that we're still hearing about how drug users see monsters or think they can fly and jump off balconies, 42 years after Sonny Bono warned us that those were common side effects of weed, but I honestly thought that the authorities had improved their propaganda, at least a little.
I dunno, man, I googled the bath salts and they sound pretty fucking horrible. I'm all for the, uh, free market but my dealers have always tended to tell me if they're pushing some heavy shit, whereas the bath salts aren't even telling you what they do, or how much you need to put in the tub. Point being if you're selling a packet of 20 doses of something that has the most charmless effects of ecstasy and crystal meth you need to get involved with some labeling.
Where can I get some?
i think calsutmoran is a pretty cool guy. eh makes you think you can fly and he doesnt afraid of anything
(You spelled DXM "PCP" by mistake)
Shai Hulud!
I think you've got a superfluous "he" there, anonymous.
Just to be on the safe side, I've sworn off baths.
I'LL show you the life of the mind.
"I was in a world where everything was dead, and nothing was real..."
This was bath country.
Just like all those fools who told me how bad crack was! HA! What a crock that turned out to be! They were wrong once and have therefore been wrong ever since! HA! The fools!
No bs did you really communicate with calsutmoran?
No bs did you really communicate with calsutmoran?
No bs did you really communicate with calsutmoran?
That is what leadership is all about, yo. Go ask Alia Atreides.
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