Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Never Fills You Up, Never Lets You Down

This is a moment in which both those who serve in the administration and those who support it need to ask whether the Obama administration is keeping sight of its values now that it holds power.

-Ezra Klein
So. Values are the literally inconsequential statements made during a publicity campaign rather than the consequential actions that flow from power. Fucking tastes great, and less filling? Sign me up, baby.

Obama's "values" are killing people with flying robots, giving money to evil, criminal banks, torturing prisoners, lying, prevaricating, and golfing; not necessarily in that order. How is it that every time this fucking horror-show monster cranks up the apocalypse engine, there is some weaselly little careerist ready to pop up in full squirrel to squeak about how unseemly it is to unseal the necromonican and call down the flesh-eating elder gods when you campaigned on a promise to increase Pell grants. Oh, Mister President, would you mind tossing some money to PA to fund Adult Basic before you crack open the bones of the earth and start throwing virgins into the pit? That'd be great, mkay, thanx! ;) Hashtag retarded.

27 comments:

Charles F. Oxtrot said...

Yes, Ezra! Now, as opposed to....?

Damn, he's confused me. Must be because I'm so dumb!

patrick said...

Horrorshow indeed, droog.

Anonymous said...

Incandescent as usual. I believe "Necromonicon" is spelled with two Os though -

Justin said...

He's fooled em all once into thinking he shared their values and now they're coming back begging to be fooled again.

Crusader AXE said...

The only thing I tend to agree with the Tea Pary on is the need for some sort of radical change. Since I've read the constitution a few times, I think it's a good place to start. Problem is that government on the size of the US is a sausage maker. In making sausage, it makes perfect sense to need some Afghanistan but substitute some Iraq because, what the fuck, it's just sausage. It's ok to give more money to the insurance companies and say that it's health care reform because it's ultimately just sausage. I was sitting in a restaurant across from the Renaissance Center in Detroit ten years or so ago, having dinner with my sister, niece and nephew. They had a board with their daily specials. One was "fish sausage..." My nephew and I both looked at it, stared at each other and Ryan said "There's so much wrong with that it's impossible to get your head around it." Well, it's just sausage.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9FplNrn9Gc&feature=related

Professor Coldheart said...

giving money to evil, criminal banks

I love how the vagaries of English grammar render this as either one item ("giving money to evil criminal banks") or two ("giving money to evil" AND "criminal banks"), and it works either way.

Enron said...

Don't forget Da Bulls

Anonymous said...

AXE -- I can point you to a restaurant, also in SE Michigan, that'll offer you something it calls "fish loins". I asked the waitron what that could possibly be, and she didn't see what the problem was.
-- sglover

Yog said...

It's 3 fucking Os. And you've both got mon where you oughta have nom.

Fucking idiots, need more catsup!

LA Confidential Pantload said...

Anybody who believes that "hope," "change," or "winning the future" are some sort of statements of values-to-be-reflected-in-policy as opposed to political horseshit is too stupid to be allowed to walk upright.

Anonymous said...

I can has crawling?

¯\(°_0)/¯ said...

Is Ezra Klein an Ohio St. alum or something?

mistah charley, ph.d. said...

May the Creative Forces of the Universe stand beside us, and guide us, through the Night with the Light from Above -

and have mercy on our souls, if any

MosesZD said...

Damn, but you're brilliant. Because that's pretty much how I feel about the situation. Only I sound more like "hey you kids, get off my Constitution..."

Ethan said...

Necronomican't

Necronomican-do attitude

Necronomican-can

rob payne said...

Who can make the sun shine?

The Necronomican man can.

Sung to the tune of "The Candy Man Can."

dSquib said...

But Ezra wants fewer drone attacks in Pakistan too. Don't you see? You're on the same side, you guys! Hear me now, the pendulum has swung too far from killing no babies and torturing no people to killing lots of babies and torturing mere dissenters. An adjustment is needed!

Michael Smith said...

He's fooled em all once into thinking he shared their values

Actually, he didn't fool them at all. He was really rather candid. They fooled themselves.

Happy Jack said...

I see IOZ has stumbled upon the cherub that fell from the facade of Yggy's condo.

dah_sab said...

I want to win the future. Does that make me a bad person?

davidly said...

Actually, he didn't fool them at all. He was really rather candid. They fooled themselves.

And he also repeatedly reminded them that they were the power behind him; that without them he wouldn't be able to either enact the change they sought, or get away with the shit he'd be pulling.

He does have an agreeable necronomiconstitution, though.

rowan said...

If you're using hashtags, IOZ, you must be on Twitter. Aha! I think I found you!

http://twitter.com/#!/ioz4

"Architecture,Politics,Gay Sex,Alcohol,Music,Fashion,Drugs,Electronics, Art and a pround Liberal. yup thats me,take a picture!"

If there's one think monsieur is, it's a pround Liberal!

LA Confidential Pantload said...

Maybe it's a "pound" liberal - you know, as opposed to one raised by a registered AKC breeder.

fish said...

Maybe an Ezra Pound liberal.

Cookiemonster said...

Proust liberal?

Sausage all the way down said...

Proust missile liberal.

Anonymous said...

You had me at "squirrel". Ezra as a furry? #winning