I go away for a week and when I come home I discover that NORAD has shot down Santa Claus.
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39 comments:
Worthy fuckin' adversary.
So _that_ was your secret mission!
R U a Navy Seal?
I'm 100% certain this will be forever and for always the best thing anyone will write on the topic.
I heard there was a bazillion-kegger in front of Alpha Phi Donk last night.
The forces of peace were successful last night.
every day the news is the same
Now we know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall.
We should all hold out for Osama's long form death certificate.
I'm sure Trump is on the case.
72 virgins. checkmate.
Gotta be impressed by the Paki security forces on this one. Scammed USG out of billions by keeping the bigbad on ice. He might be in Pakistan! Pay us to look for him! Nope, still didn't find him! Need more money!
USG attacked Afghanistan over sheltering Bin Laden and Al Q. And the Pakistani regime? Whatarewegonnadoaboutit? Not a damn thing. Not even going to shut off the funding, I'll bet. How's that for being a big pussy?
Tommy, you can't do this! You don't bump guys! You're not like those animals back there. It's not right, Tom! They can't make us do this. It's the wrong situation, they can't make us different people than we are. We're not muscle, Tom. I... I... I... never killed anybody. I used a little information for a chisel, that's all. It's my nature, Tom! I... I... I... can't help it, somebody gives me an angle, I play it. I don't deserve to die for that. Do you think I do? I'm... I'm... I'm just a grifter, Tom. I'm... I'm... I'm... I'm... I'm an nobody! But I'll tell you what, I never crossed a friend, Tom. I never killed anybody, I never crossed a friend, nor you, I'll bet. We're not like those animals! This is not us! Th... th... this is some hop dream! It's a dream, Tommy! I'm praying to you! I can't die! I can't die... out here in the woods, like a dumb animal! In the woods, LIKE A DUMB ANIMAL! Like a dumb animal! I can't... I can't... I CAN'T DIE OUT HERE IN THE WOODS!... like a dumb animal. I can't... die! I'm praying to you! Look in your heart! I'm praying to you! Look in your heart! I'm praying to you! Look in your heart! I'm praying to you! Look in your heart...
Only took 10 years, several wars, several hundred thousand casualties, and a couple trillion bernankebux.
Professor C.---
Maybe Tommy in the woods with Bernie is American muscle under Clinton; Tommy strategizing with then chasing Bernie shoeless after hearing "I start eating in restaurants", is American muscle under Bush; and Tommy just pulling the trigger after sending in Johnny Caspar is America muscle under Obama. Hmmm, casting Verna....
This is all part of your sick Cynthia thing.
I'm sorry but I'm really confused. Which one is Osama? Is that the president? Or is it the other guy?
That must have an amazing feeling for Obama to be able to walk up to Bush's old To Do list on the whiteboard he left behind and put a big check next to "Terrorism".
p.s. the celebrations are gross
Hah, Goldstein can't be killed
How dare you, sir. It is America's GOD-GIVEN RIGHT to celebrate the killing of the people America has killed.
I don't understand this post.
Greenwald who is more literal, has decided to play the part Chomsky played after 9/11, though more intentionally. It seems almost masochistic to do so but fwiw, I thought it was good.
My close personal cyberfriend, Jonathan Schwarz of A Tiny Revolution, has a thoughtful observation which deserves sharing with a wider audience:
Lots of Americans were mad it took ten years for the government to kill bin Laden, but I think it was worth being extra careful to make sure no one else got hurt.
They threw his body into the sea and now we can't eat it.
Sing it with me now, boyos.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdvITn5cAVc
It's gonna suck for everyone when they find out it was Jaime Lannister who did the deed.
Osama sleeps with the fishes.
I am amazed. Inkberrow actually came up with something genuinely witty. It's a sign of the End Times.
Dude, every single person on Twitter came up with that joke five different times last night.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WA_xXWSXyFI
Lil'Anton for da win.
Wifey 2 me, this evening: "You heard they killed Obama?"
Capt'n Obvious
Ya know, ZOZ, if ya really wanna feel a frisson of revulsion mount from your gorge to your throat, go find a copy of Howard Fast's original novel "Spartacus", and read any of the passages in which he so well delineates how absolutely terrified the mighty Romans were of this lowly slave and his ragtag band of exgladiators, displaced farmers, et alia.
ZOZ - of course I meant "re-read any of the passages" - I know you've read it ...
The man in the black pajamas dude. Eyeball to eyeball.
To Sr. Alexander
It's Osama bin Laden (Sam for short) and the other guy is Obama sin Biden (Joe Lieberman's stunt double).. Terrorists all
He was right under our big Jew noses all this time!
HAHAHAHAHA!!! Are we allowed to laugh at what Gridlock said?
I don't know about anyone else, but my big Jew nose snorted embarrassingly.
I misread this--I thought you said NORAD had been shot down BY Santa Claus. What you actually said is pretty much dog bites man, just another example of collateral damage unless it was intentional.
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