I sat down the The Internet Investment Bubble to talk finance, economics, and his predictions for the winner of this season's Ru Paul's Drag Race.
IOZ: It's great to see you again.
THE INTERNET INVESTMENT BUBBLE: Likewise. You're looking fabulous.
IOZ: No, you're looking fabulous. It's been ages!
IIB: Like a decade.
IOZ: You haven't changed.
IIB: Oh, hush. I'll be sure to tell my colorist you said so.
IOZ: Are you still going to Marc-André.
IIB: Girl, that tired-ass queen? Please. I'm going to Viktor-with-a-K.
IOZ: Get. Out. I used to go to Victor-with-a-C.
IIB: He was cuter.
IOZ: So true.
IIB: Like that classic Cadinot scene at the barber.
IOZ: I love that one. With the nerdy guy in glasses.
IOZ: Ten years, really?
IIB: Eleven, I think.
IOZ: We were so fucking young. I can't believe it. We used to go dancing.
IIB: We used to do coke.
IOZ: I never.
IIB: It just flew up your nose. By accident.
IOZ: I was so like, where did this bill come from? Who rolled it up? How did it get up my nose?
IIB: You wore tank-tops.
IOZ: Oh gawd.
IIB: You were a bottom.
IOZ: Lies and deceptions.
IIB: I still remember your Manhunt profile.
IOZ: No, that was even before Manhunt. That was, like, still Gay.com.
IIB: AOL m4m.
IOZ: Shush, I'm not that old.
IIB: Not quite.
IOZ: So, let me ask you: seriously. Are you for real?
IIB: You mean, like, the Instagram thing?
IOZ: A billion, really?
IIB: Well, it is the internet. It's like when the profile says eight inches.
IOZ: Five inches.
IIB: Measured on the bottom.
IOZ: Includes the balls.
IOZ: Girl. So what are the implications?
IIB: The ramifications?
IIB: Same as before. You know how I roll.
IOZ: Such a bitch.
IIB: Is it my fault I look this good?
IOZ: You do look good.
IIB: Ashtanga. I've got better abs than when I was twenty.
IOZ: So I see.
IIB: We never fooled around.
IOZ: We'll never fool around.
IIB: We made out, once.
IOZ: We were so high on pets.com. We were tripping.
IIB: Well, maybe in another ten.
IOZ: You'll be back?
IIB: I never left.